It’s been a moment

Yup, it’s me, back again after many months away. It’s not that I haven’t had anything to say, it’s just that I’ve been pooling my energy into other ventures. Here’s a few updates as to why I’ve been so MIA. I’ve been amping up podcasts with the GCE podcast and just migrated our host to Anchor.FM. I recently got back access of the Instagram, which I had been locked out of forever, so I’m redeveloping the social media strategy there.

NaNoWriMo is underway in less than a month. It will be my eighth year participating, and hopefully, my eighth win. It’s my third as Municipal Liaison for the the region and this year I have planned more events than ever before. Yet, I still don’t have a story idea. There’s still time so the worry hasn’t fully set in. My main concern is on my trip at the end of the month. I’m going to Mexico City with a few friends to celebrate birthdays and Day of the Dead. We’re very excited about this and I’m already scoping out some nerdy things to see. It won’t be as nerdy as my England and Scotland trip, but, nerdy travel is my niche.

Perhaps with my other ventures now running more smoothly, I can dedicate more time into my site. My to-do list has slimmed down.

Happy Autumn, friends, I feel it’ll be a good one.

Adventure Awaits!

In just a few days I will be closing out the year alongside one of my best friends as we dash off to London and Edinburgh. It’s my first big trip in a really long time and it couldn’t come any sooner. I still have to somehow survive Christmas…

On the 26th, I’ll be flying to London and packing a ton of things to do in just a few days. We’ll then be heading to Edinburgh for more adventures and kicking off the New Year’s at the Hogmanay Street Party. I have only ever been in New York for New Year’s so the prospect of being somewhere new means possibilities are endless. This past year was really something for me, and it looks like 2019 will be kicking off the same way.

There’s still so much preparation to do before the trip – I haven’t packed my suitcase yet and I still need to finish up some presents. My mind has kept busy at work thinking about the trip.

So here’s 2018, farewell. To 2019, I am so ready for you and then adventure that awaits.

November, November

Handling insanity, professionally

I’m trying out WordPress’ new editor, Gutenberg. It’s similar to the Elementor plugin I have been using. I can’t for the life of me figure how to change that header image. It’s very confusing. Anywho, it’s November, and if you know me, you know that means it’s the greatest time of the year! 

No, no, I’m not talking about Thanksgiving next week or Christmas in just a few weeks after that, but we’re smack dab in the middle of the National Novel Writing Month. I cannot believe I have been participating in NaNoWriMo for six years. This is my second year as an ML. I am taking it easy this year and actually using it as a time to journal. Very therapeutic and I actually did come up with a novel idea.


My Great Perhaps

Sometimes I feel that I am ambling my way through life, not sure of which direction I really want to go in, and despite not always sure of where I’m off to next, my feet continue to carry me forward. Though, forward sometimes follows a zigzag pattern. In my mind, there is no backwards, and I think, after several years of consistently working hard, that I need to take a step back. This doesn’t mean slacking off in the work that I already do, but allowing myself more time to enjoy and experiencelife outside of work.

There have been clues that I’ve needed to do this for awhile. These little flags consisting of burnouts and breakdowns were becoming all too normal. It became clear that I had been checking off ‘not attending’ or ‘unable to make it’ to a lot of events held by friends and family. And what was my reason?

Work.

Work. Work. Work.

And I wouldn’t have seen it that way until it was pointed out to me. You never come to these things, you’re always working. In my head, I was doing the noble thing. I was pursuing my career, my next big adventure, and wondering, why can’t they just be supportive? I’ll be at their next birthday when this project is done. But the projects are never done, and I continue to dip my hands in more and more because I like the intoxication of being busy, of letting work consume me. And now it’s consumed me so much, I look back on the past few years and pose the question; was I working to live or living to work?

Birthdays, like New Years, are points of reflection. And as my next birhday looms on the horizon, I realized, I need to stop missing out on these things. These events are important to me. They connect me with my family, my friends. I think we all have times where we have to reconsider our priorities and obligations.

The decisions I’m mulling over for my next steps do scare me. They are some of the biggest leaps I will ever be taking. But I’m comforted in the fact that I’ve been ‘fearless’ before. I’ve skydived. I’ve booked a spontaenous two-month trip to Italy with an agenda that was scrapped once I got there. But the skydiving was when I was 20 years old. The trip to Italy was in 2014. Now I’m  just a few years away from 30, and I wonder why I have tossed my bucket list aside. Rabelais’ last words were “I go to seek a great perhaps.” And I fully acknowledge that I don’t know what lies in store for me, but I hope the ride will be worth it.

I say I love travel but haven’t done much outside of weekend getaways or destination parties. Or even the occasional work trip. But in my inbox sits a bevy of travel emails, beckoning me to traverse the trails and wander the primordial lands of some far off place. And I sigh looking at these while on my breaks, checking my calender and seeing I’m already booked up or can’t take the time off because it will coincidence with something else. My busy schedule has allowed me to realize that my little day and weekend trips are travel. I live in one of the most interesting regions in the world. Take for instance, my last post, in which I legitametly stopped to smell the flowers  – the lavender flowers. I had no idea that there was a lavender field just a short drive away. But it’s opened my eyes to the possibility that there is so much more just within reach.

This summer I’ve taken a magnifying glass to my behavior and have been reassesing what I want and scarily enough, it may not be the same thing I wanted just a few short years ago. That thought alone absolutely terrifies me. I’ve worked so hard and now I may want something else. My mind spins gut-wrenching thoughts about starting from scratch again. Whatever my next move is, I’ll be glad to have just moved.

 

A Flirtation Through Lavender

 

Over the past year I have been grappling with the idea of identity.

Not in the same way the great philosophers of yore have pondered their own existence. Examining my identity is more on a personal level than where I stand in the universe. I’ve been thinking a lot about how to be my most authentic self within the realm of societal land circumstantial limitations. Admittedly, a big part of this is due to the fact that everyone in my life seems to be caught up in their own doings and it had me thinking how much of my own self I view through the lens of others. Who are you when no one else is around?

Yesterday, I took the nearly two-hour drive out East to Lavender by the Bay, a sprawling 17-acre farm that grows both French and English lavender. Accordingly to recent social media posts y the farm, it was the last weekend for the French lavender to be in bloom and I knew it was something I wanted to behold. But when I asked around, everyone already had plans or had something come up last minute. I was dejected because these kinds of sweet experiences in life that celebrate bounty and growth should be shared. And I had no one to share it with.

But I still went.

It was hard taking the drive out there, with my windows rolled down and my playlist bumping out a mishmash of indie and pop music. I was alone but trying to starve the loneliness. Once I got to the farm the persistent feeling of loneliness didn’t quit. Instead, it deepened. To be in such a beautiful place and feel so empty was disheartening. I felt I couldn’t truly be in the moment. But, nevertheless, I headed forwarded, loosing my self in thought and contemplation. I snapped a few pictures here and there and wondered if posting these on social media and receiving comments or likes would suffice. Photos are a wonderful way to share experiences, moments, even if through the lens they were fleeting. I think utilizing social media in this way can be a positive experience. I didn’t spend the whole time I was there scrolling endlessly on my Instagram or liking statuses. I didn’t even spend the entire time taking pictures or videos on my own equipment. There were moments when I enjoyed the solitude, wherein I was tapped in to the moment and every path I’ve taken in life felt like a direct route to getting here.

I’ve been fortunate enough in my life to cross paths with many beautiful vistas. The lavender fields on Long Island have been added to that roster. They were enchanting, and every time I encounter the charming fragrance I’ll have another happy memory to think about.

My identity was challenged yesterday because I feared if I was alone that I wouldn’t matter. This wasn’t the case as it has never been. I’m still an adult trying to navigate through life and it’s okay to be alone but not lonely.

The redesign is coming

Quick website update, I’ve been working hard behind the scenes redesigning my site so it may look a bit odd at the moment. There’s a lot of components behind it! Thanks for stopping by and please reach out to me if you have any questions. I look forward to the relaunch in a few weeks!

 

Best

Laura–

After the trauma

On Saturday night I was on a train home that derailed. Preliminary investigations by the NTSB suggest a service train violated our trains space as they were both traveling eastbound on both of the tracks. There had been service work on the Long Island Railroad trains all weekend.

It is so strange to go through this experience. In one instance, I am so connected to and on another I am brimming with curiosity. My day had been so wonderful up until that point and I’m finding it difficult to put the feeling out of my mind. A quote I read about another tragedy this weekend, the Palms Springs shooting of two police officers during a domestic violence call, replays in my mind. I feel awake in a nightmare.

The worst part on a personal level about today, about the day after, is I can’t stop feeling like I am shaking. My body is tense and if I close my eyes for too long or don’t have my mind occupied on something else, I get the sensation of being thrashed around. When our train and the other vehicle hit each other prompting the train to derail, that is the moment I keep reliving in my head. It’s not just picturing it over again, it’s the sensation of how my body was contorted. There was no sense of balance or control, it was chaos. In my head, the loud bang resounds and I cringe.

On another level, I have been viewing this day with profound humility. There were about 600 passengers on the train, 33 were injured and 4 seriously. I am so thankful to walk away from this event unscathed.

As a try to categorize my thoughts and reflect, I’m reminded about my fortune. It’s been a crazy 24 hours. At the moment, my life exists in a fishbowl and I’m not sure if I’m look in or looking out.

For more information on the LIRR derailment, read up on the following news links:

Time: http://time.com/4524216/long-island-train-derailment-what-to-know 

ABC News: http://abcnews.go.com/US/commuter-train-derails-east-nyc-injuring-11/story?id=42675137

train

October and the Wonders of Fall

This year has been marked by several outstanding events. From weddings to engagements, to conventions, Broadway shows and milestones. On a personal level, it is a year to remember. Entering October, with three months still in the balance, it’s a good time to go through a little reflection. Not to mention, I’m also gearing up for NaNoWriMo, which I’ve done the past three years (and won).

Fall is my favorite season. It really boils down to the coziness of the entire time. Also, the best things happen in fall. New York Comic Con, Halloween, Thanksgiving… basically nerdy stuff and food. I will be at NYCC this year as an attendee, which is nice considering last year I worked at the event. Looking toward next year, I hope to return as a guest. It will be another great year at the event as I am already booked to meet the great Stan Lee.

On Sept. 21, I had the opportunity to see Hamilton on Broadway. The musical created by the genius Lin-Manuel Miranda went above expectations for me. It was humorous and honest, self-depreciating and intelligent. I have been listening to the soundtrack on a daily basis since November of last year and it has truly been gift to me throughout the entire year. I mention it because I want to get to my point.

My life is filled with so much art. And fall is always that season where art is incessantly there. I curl up with books more, watch more movies and television shows. Even video games fit into this section. I am my best self when I am surrounded by it, and people who feel as strongly and passionate about art.

With a chill in the air and leaves returning to warming hues of autumn, I am most excited for all the art that I will get to experience.

My sister’s engagement video

Steph & G's Engagement Reaction Video Compilation

This video is about SSteph Rdh Cerrone & Giancarlo DiMonte's engagement. Check out the reactions of some of my family hearing about the big news. It's best if you watch in HD 😀

Posted by Laura Cerrone on Sunday, January 31, 2016

I put together this little video of my sister’s engagement story. The link sends you to my public Facebook page. You’re more than welcome to follow that page. That’s been getting a facelift, too.

It seems I fell asleep for a bit.

Yes, look at this large gap in activity.

I let life get in the way, and now I’m busier now than ever. Which isn’t a total bad thing, but, I wish I had more hours in the day.

A lot has happened since November

  • I won NaNoWriMo, I never posted a celebratory message, but I did. It was insanely difficult this year, given my work schedule. Yet, it was so relieving to know that I can set my mind to an intense goal and accomplish it.
  • December was quieter, post-NaNo is pretty much catch-up-on-sleep-month. Christmas was 70 degrees here in New York and we barbecued. My dad also stood outside our house in shorts, a Hawaiian shirt and an alcoholic beverage in a pineapple.
  • January was a mic of work and more work. We’re gunning down to the last few months before my brothers wedding, so it’s been crazier. Even crazier, my sister got engaged. So, now preparing for two weddings. If you would like to go to a zoo, just come over.

So that leaves us in February, which is really just filled with wedding planning and personal training. Winters are usually quite quiet for me, but it’s been the opposite. I wouldn’t say that I fell asleep, but rather just got so caught up in life ~outside~ the internet that I took a little break.

But I’m back.

Hello.

P.S. – I desperately want to see Hamilton the Musical. Help?!